WORSHIPPING TO THE HEART’S TUNE

 “These hearts come forth and go back” – Imam Ali (as)

It is with a heavy heart that we bid farewell to the holy month of Rajab. But with its departure it leaves in its wake two more months of godly goodness, two months unrivalled in their sanctity.  

60 more days, culminating in the royal spiritual feast that is Laylatul Qadr, for us to march on in our quest to crush our egos and return to the path of Allah (swt).

But with these holy nights also come those seemingly endless amaaals that we’re all too aware of.

Namaaz after namaaz, tasbeeh after tasbeeh, dua after dua.

A question I ask myself whenever I try to worship (which really isn’t too often, maybe once in an Eid moon), is is my heart really into it, or am I just going through the motions, flipping through the pages of Mafitihul Jinan just because it’s an important night in the calendar.

The issue here is not to do with reward or thawaab. Allah’s (swt) unparalleled mercy promises that in abundance for anybody who turns to Him.

The question here is about how present our hearts are when we sit for hours on end, performing one act after the other.

What does it mean when Imam Ali (as) says ‘the heart comes forth and go back?’

You know that feeling when it’s time to pray but you just don’t feel like doing wudhu and heading for the musalla? Those times when it feels like a chore to sit down and recite even a few verses of the Qur’an.

That’s when the heart, like the tide in the ocean, has gone back and retreated.  

But there are also times when, inexplicably, you genuinely feel like gazing into the pages of the Qur’an. You yearn to sit alone on the prayer mat and speak to your creator through one of Imam Sajjad’s (as) magnificent supplications.

Your heart is receptive, and you WANT to get closer to God and connect with Him. This is when the heart, according to Imam Ali (as), has come forth.

In one of his many lectures, Sheikh Saeed Bahmanpour beautifully puts it when he says that in ibaadah, “follow your heart - don’t let your heart follow you.”

When it comes to worship, always strive to do what appeases the heart. If you don’t feel like reading Qur’an, then don’t force yourself to read the Qur’an.

Maybe try directing your efforts in reciting a small dua or performing a few units of prayers or even sitting in a quiet place and contemplating. Listen to your heart.

There is a joy in worship that can only be felt when the heart is in tune with our actions.

It only makes sense to stick to the basics by doing the wajib when you feel your heart has gone back. 

It just doesn’t add up to force mustahab actions down its throat, after all, our hearts are not bank accounts that will happily gobble up anything that comes their way.